Taking it slowly

I have found that it is worthwhile to take things a little slower. Maybe put my multi-tasking skills down for a bit and concentrate on one...thing...at...a...time. I watch a woman I admire who does everything deliberately. She speaks only after thinking. She washes dishes one at a time. She stops to pet the dog, but only after stopping to put whatever she is holding away. She focuses on you when you speak to her and looks you in the eye. She drives with a sense of calm, never distressing what the time or traffic is - knowing she can not control either. I watch her and I am amazed. I realize that right now, for me, this is what I need to do.

I played John Schmidt's "Waterfall" today at my children's elementary school for a 'Parent Talent Show'. About the time I was supposed to go up they discovered that their time budget did not match the number of volunteers. I offered to be taken off of the program, but seeing my son's excitement and look of protest at the thought, they kept me in. To try to make amends, I made an interesting choice. I chose to try to 'hurry' through the song. Now, if you've heard the song Waterfall, you'll know why it was interesting. If you haven't, let me explain that playing it at speed is playing it slightly slower than the speeds reached at a Nascar race. Trying to hurry through it, especially at my skill level, has pretty much the same result as throwing several large boulders on the Nascar track.

However, I have taken to doing other things slower and with more focus and every time it has brought it's own sense of calm and been a good experience. Each time I realize that I am just a person, not a super hero - and somehow, instead of feeling bad about it, I feel very satisfactory. I feel that, yes, I may only be doing one thing, but I'm doing my best to do it well. And, if I'm putting my priorities in order, for the most part, whatever needs to come next can wait while I get the first thing done.

In the end, I can only do what I can do - and that will just have to be good enough.